Nov 28 2009
Encouragement For Stuttering Child
One morning, a three-year-old boy named Adam turned to his mother and said, “M-m-m-mommy, can I, can I, can I have ssssome milk?” His mother said she didn’t feel alarmed since he had never spoken like that before, so she just passed the milk and waited for him to stop his “childhood stuttering phase.” Five years later, Adam was still stuttering with even shorter breaks and more problems as time went on. Adam complains that it makes him angry sometimes. “Kids tease me. They call me A-a-a-a-dam. My stuttering is like a ferocious animal that no one understands and it’s all my fault,” he explains. Adam’s mother advises parents of a stuttering child to seek qualified help as soon as the problem starts. After witnessing her son’s pain, she now knows it’s always “better to be safe than sorry.”
Parents often wonder how they can help a stuttering child. After all, there must be proper reinforcement at home to help the child overcome the stuttering problem. As a parent, you might wonder, “Should I ignore the stuttering, encourage every proper sentence, or push my child to try again when he fails?” Here are some things to try. Give the child enough time to express his thoughts, no matter how many tries it takes. Secondly, make eye contact with your child whenever he is speaking. Try to use rhymes, songs and games with young children to make speaking fun and rewarding for them. Whenever you speak, do so in a calm, reassuring manner to encourage the child to do the same. Try to keep the home as free from stress as possible and seek professional advice.
There are also some things that parents should not do with a child who stutters. A common mistake is to finish the sentence for the child, which will make him feel inferior and confused. Forcing children to speak or recite something in front of visitors is also a huge embarrassment. Cruel comments like “stop stuttering” or “say it again without stuttering” will only demean the child and prohibit any sort of recovery. Even nicer prompts like “think about what you want to say before you say it” or “focus and try again” — can be troublesome and frustrating. Parents must not convey disappointment in the child’s efforts; only encouragement. The schoolyard can be a cold and lonely place for kids who are perceived as being different. Be aware of the school situation and try to ensure that no one is teasing your child about his stuttering problem.
The stuttering child has much more to contend with than improving language skills. “Working on techniques to cope with stuttering are not enough because children’s hurt feelings are getting in the way,” explains William Murphy, who has worked in the speech therapy field at Purdue University for over 20 years. “Even the children who receive therapy to help them live with stuttering continue to have negative feelings as they grow older. Their ability to communicate is still hindered by the shame and embarrassment they feel about stuttering, which is often brought on from bullying and teasing.” In his latest 110-page book, “Bullying and Teasing: Helping Children who Stutter,” Murphy researches how shame and guilt can affect a child’s stuttering and anxiety.
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